the promotion of cultural diversity + inter-cultural dialogue – cover page could explicitly relate to food + fashion. for example, see cover page + page 1 of “what is a city if not the people?” as a guide or photography and text
symbiosis. that being said, project
displays a concise contents page which is easy to navigate and exhibits crisp
document structure. got stuck on point 4
of the 04. concept plan. what is “internam arrangement” ? amplify on this point so three is no
confusion. credit graphics on p’s 4, 5,
6, 8, 14, 15, 17 – 23. 02. status quo,
the three layers – 1: land use, 2: institutional, 3: mobility, need their own
separate pages to engage with the material.
03. precedent study – the 3 areas would benefit from plans of maboneng,
pompidou and Portobello so we see the relationship between solid + void. abstract concept can be enhanced with text on
the graphic – things like east-west axis, north-south spine, green park space,
rail and whatever the orange is. strong
p14. work on beefing up the plan on p20,
reclaiming public spaces graphic, with material colour, so its explicit what is
road reserve, cycle lane, recycler lane etc.
explanatory text on the graphic on
the right hand side of p21. are
those layers, sections, ? articulate
this in a more structured way. as a lead
into the final task, perhaps you may write about a real lived experienced where
culture clashed, based on something. see
me on tuesday to explain what I mean.
otherwise the work is simply sublime.
excellent work
the reclamation game: widening the board and introducing new players – correct the word withing on
p1. very good intro followed by a very
comprehensive project. to tie it all
together, in the final task, I suggest the following: a plethora of godsell
illustrations plus vignettes like on p12 and p18 + sections to take the project
from a 2d to a 3d presentation and also to address the blocks edge
condition. excellent work
combating unemployment in joubert park through the reconfiguration
of space – interesting cover page which lacks
author’s details. on the intro page p1,
there is a credit to madjana, who is that?
overall the project exhibits maturity and is attempting, in a
constructive manner, to grapple with complex inner city issues. it requires better structure and better
formatting. it cannot, for example, have
different fonts and font sizes. unpack,
graphically, the opportunities for employment theme p8 and make it relevant to
your study area.. demonstrate what the
ingredients [note spelling] for democratic street are to the study area. shouldn’t this be ingredients for a democratic street instead? the conclusion needs
more work and it has to be specific to Johannesburg. the beginnings of good work.
fluid itineraries: reconfiguring border conditions – excellent cover image followed by an excellent intro which sets
up the project perfectly. define border. google images are difficult to access. are they meant to be demonstrating the green
or lack of it? perhaps a graphic might
be more appropriate. like the one at the
top of the page. the concept p7 sets up
a wonderful and convincing narrative yet fails to deliver on what stiches the
focus area together. this should be the udf, yet it is not. the spatial
narrative gets lots from here onwards as the project drops down in scale and
focus, rather thinly and unconvincingly on the joubert precinct. there is so much potential excellent material
here that unfortunately is not realised in he overall udf. lets speak on Tuesday so we can identify the
shortcomings of the project – for example, what is the overall arching theme
that ties the concept together. the
reconfiguration on twist street needs to be bolder, where does the northbound
bus stop? the beginnings of acceptable
work.
dealing with discomfort of downtown – clear cover + contents page which constructs the argument well,
especially the intro page. understanding
publicness is concise. keep reusing the
three streams | strands of publicness: ownership;
access + use. bring in the strand of
ownership belonging. use the publication I introduce you too. the project next phase should comprise of the
graphic expression of what the project asks in understanding publicness – what should a public space provide? excellent work.
what is a city if not the people
– sublime work. next phase should be the
graphic articulation of the principles, which are identified in the intro,
which frame the project: porosity; safety; activity, connectivity + passive
surveillance. a photographic spatial
plan of p4 + 5, of where the images are from would enhance the project. why isn’t the route of wolmarans st on p14
not identified on p7. what happened to
page 6? excellent work.
promoting safety through movement and activity – concluding page? buffered
bike corridor can have a much more complex network and traverse much more of
the city’s fabric. this is also true for
the trolley puller’s lane. very good
concept on p1 which could be made into a realistic urban project. push this concept. this should be then expressed in the
proceeding pages, which, in the current project, fails to do so. why?
concept is rendered on p1 and never seen again, except for a tentative
stab on p5. pity. poor work.
towards enrich public life in transitional spaces of urban setting:
end street park – shouldn’t the tile
read towards enriching . . ? note
spelling of catalytic on the contents page.
the initial reading, by the assessor, of the project was rather shallow. a regrettable mishap. but, after a revisit, the project displays discerning maturity far above the expected level and it is articulated in a refreshing
manner. the concept page is a gem, which
compels viewing and reviewing and re-reviewing and re- . . . simply sublime work.
rejuvenating the edge condition(s)
– after the kurt elling lyrics the project takes an uncomfortable nosedive. concept needs to be stronger. the project displays a search for
something. we just have to find that something
together. bring some butcher paper to
tomorrows class, lets sit and find that something. together.
enhancing the relationship between schools, parks and transport
interchange – contents page and
project is missing a conclusion. strong
concept where the graphics can all be mixed into one, making it pink, maroon +
black. mix the graphics on the left hand
side of the page with the ones on the right hand side, then place the
explanatory text towards the right hand side of the page. do more with the graphic on the metro scale
page. the map can display much
more. make what the project extracts
from the precedent study more pronounced and explicit. design principle graphics can display more
colour, as in green for the greenery, orange for trade stalls. differentiate the levels in the built volume
and materials of the surfaces in the plan.
movement slide is poor. why isn’t
the train articulated? explain in
greater detail p14, improving edge conditions.
get this project tighter.
frustrating work.
urban landscapes [through the lens] – an excellent prequel to the next task. we wait with bated breath and whispering
humbleness. chose a project in a scheme
and articulate it. the decking on noord
street in bringing in the linear link for example. in the project , you then have to display
horizontal, vertival diversity + inside-outside connections; how the
pedestrianised street begins or ends on noord, and how the precedent decking
will compliment the public realm and bring in or reinforce the concept of
cityness. all this then should be
supported, graphically, by all that is named on p10. excellent work.
task 4 – edge condition – what
is the overall theme? not quite certain
what this project is.
task_4 an_alphabet – what is
the overall theme? fantastic cover page
which would have been enhanced with a project title. a confusing project which relies heavily on
work done in the group phase and very thin individual work. it is very difficult to engage with a project
of this nature at this level of an academic process. poor work.
